ME.

i'm going to be honest about myself..spit out whatever that's on my mind..if u dont like it..u can get the shit out of here...so,this is me..i'm sonia ayesha..i think i'm special.i love dreaming..pretending to be someone when i'm not.i have high hopes in the future..to be rich n sucessful.n to help the needs.i've even drew my future house..it has all been plan..i know it's stoopid..but it's not..i started having all these dreams..writing it down ever since i was 9 years old..it might come true one day.i'm going to pray for it.n prove it to you guys.to kids..that..dreams do come true..i tend to do everything..i just like it..which makes me a very talented person..i'm very adventurous..i take risks..i dont really care about what people think of me..because i dont fake it..to make people like me..i love blogging..i love staying at home because i get a lot of things done..i collect clothes,receipts,books,magazines n diaries..i wake up at 7 and go jogging everymorning..i play the piano a lot..at least 2 hours a day..i dance..too much..i bake delicious muffins,cookies n cakes..i'm praising myself..soo what?..does it cause u any problem?..mom says..have an attitude..ur friends..they'll go like..POYO..reading isnt cool..u see...these things that they say..makes u loose ur hope or dreams....dont have to care what people say..coz i'm not going to be afraid of people now..i WANT to change..i WANT to work hard to try my best..to be a high achiever..after seeing all the top scorers for spm..it really want me to set my mind..i want to have soo many choices in my life..to go somewhere and be someone..i really do..me..i'm a happy child for now..i love myself..i'm proud of myself..i know who i am and what i'm able to do..my life..it's wonderful..it's perfect..but it's not enough..my family..their always here for me..my life is filled with soo many things..i thank god for that..but i'm not that perfect..i think everyone isnt..yes..i'm just 14..but i'm very matured for my age..i think i'm very confident..i dare to go up on stage in front of thousands of people..i argue with my sis a lot..n i always win..i'm discipline..u give me something to do..i'll really focus..n whatever i do..i must do it well..aim for the highest..evrything has to be neat..i have my schedule..everything has to be done..no matter what...everything is perfect..except when it comes to boys..i hate them..they suck..they can hurt me really bad..but i was stoopid..because of them..i totally changed..but yea..all this failure that i get..all the mistakes that i've made..it made me become a better person..it made me want to work hard..it made me want to aim for something soo high..like a star..something which is impossible to reach..but impossible is possible..i'll just have to stand up..mistakes..they're good to me..everyone does mistakes..this is how life is..sometimes u can be really down..really low..but..u cant just stay that way forever can u?..u can fix it..believe in yourself..soo yes.i can never trust boys anymore..a girl is like a sex toy to guys..i didnt believe my mom when she said..all guys only thinks about ***..but i think..she's right..i'm not really interested with guys who tends to take me seriously now..i just want to be FRIENDS..soo yea..having a cup of hot chocolate..chilling in a lounge..with great jazzy music..n a breath taking view of kl right in front of my loves..n having a good conversation is what i like..i think you'll find it boring being friends with me..i love to talk..but to have friends..not really..because..i love my family more than my friends..but in school..friends is what i need there..working together..like a team..n friends wont last forever..n i dont have the "friend" material..haha..where u care for each other 24/7..i know..it's weird..but i'm okay with it..not having people around me..in fact i like it..it gives me more privacy..n i get to do whatever i want to do..i admit that i have very few friends..but when i throw parties..i'll invite evryone!..popularity doesnt matter to me...because it ruins you..u'll have to live with people's expectation..what they think of you..you have to maintain it..u'll tend to lack in your studies..coz beauty will be evrything to you..that's not right/good..n people these days..looks is nothing..there's soo many beautiful girls out there...i've seen lots of them ..n people just dont notice you because of your looks these days..just like maria sharopova..i can come up with lots of jokes..it wont be boring talking to me..i have good topics to talk about..haha..i clown around sometime..but not too much..too much of it..means..u'r trying to attract people's attention..n come on..dont be so childish..some people say i'm a bitch..because they dont knowme that well..but wtv..i'm very dressy..i enjoy dressing up..i love my sense of style..they say it's weird..but who cares..mom says..dress up to kill..lol..people say i'm weird..people with looks are not dumb..they can be smart..looks..if u'r beautiful..use it properly...because..that's something god gave to you..n how you use it..it's up to u..i love my mom..a lot...she gives me courage..n she tells me how life is..she tells me what is right n wrong..what to do n what not to do..she always ask me to aim for the highest..working hard..i wish i have the "straight talk" attitude in me..just like dr mahathir who's againts pak lah..hmm..i think..paying attention in class does have an effect...n it's quite interesting listening to speeches..i'm seriously afraid of the future..if i might change..i cant see the future right now..n sometimes i feel like dying at an early age so that i dont have to work hard or live to my mom's expectation..but my mom says..working hard..is joy..my mom....she brought me up really well n she's just THE BEST...